Children

            In observance of Spooky Day, Odessa invited my family to her costume party. Bringing Frederick and Francis would have been a hassle. Kyle volunteered to stay home with them. Lois wanted to remain at the house as well, likely to beg her father to take her trick-or-treating, and so there was only Milton to accompany me.

            I would like to believe that Lois came to regret her decision.

            We changed into costumes at Odessa’s house. I decided upon a hot dog, and Milton transformed himself into a skeletal pirate.

            I made my way to tiny Kylie immediately.

            Milton insisted upon raking leaves in the rain. He reasoned that they made him highly uncomfortable. “But Mom, if they’re just laying everywhere, then someone might fall on them. Or they could decompose over an anthill and hurt all the little ants. Or they might just smell!”

            I surveyed the house, realizing that Odie lived with quite the group of people. A married couple and a single elderly man.

            And her first boyfriend from high school. It seemed suspicious that she should still live with him after having a baby with another man. Although, I am perhaps the worst candidate to further judge that situation.

            Similar to when we were growing up, I caught Odie in the bathroom for a conversation. I thought it was endearing that she dressed as a cop. We caught up for quite a while. “Yeah, I’ve got myself a respectable job at the corporate offices, and I pay all my taxes on time and partake in activities like movies and dancing competitions. My life is very well-adjusted.”

“That is good to hear Odie.”

“Pfft yeah! It’ll throw them off, won’t it?”

“Throw who off?”

“Oh, you know!”

“Your sister is a bit batty, isn’t she?”

            Milton finally came inside, scurrying off to someone’s bedroom for high-quality television time.

            We returned home to toddlers in the yard.

            The following day I was spoiled, coming from work to find that my two youngest children were safely asleep in their cribs.

            It was the birthday of the second twins. As I was getting Frederick up to bring him to his cake, Dedrick interrupted me with a call. I was honestly surprised that he was still interested in taking me on dates. Had he not procreated with my sister, I would have been flattered.

            Milton and Lois were quite interested by the prospect of having another child to play with at home.

            He received my chin and some other traces of my facial structure, but I thought his brow area was handsome. Mother, of course, vehemently disagreed.

            “Why didn’t anyone ever tell me about cake before? It’s delicious!”

“Babies don’t eat cake,” Milton and Lois answered in unison.

            Francis had his turn next. As with Frederick, the twins and Kyle helped me usher him into childhood. His twin brother was too occupied with dirty dishes.

            He ate his first piece of cake with me, while the older twins kept Frederick close.

            Frederick claimed the Blue Room.

            That left Francis with the Pink Room. Lois offered to trade with him, citing that boys don’t usually like pink. He snapped at her to stay out of his room, and then tucked himself into bed.

            The boys aged on a Friday, so the next morning we had a full house. My natural course of sleep was interrupted.

            My children wished to play with me. With there no longer being any toddlers in the house, I put away the playpen and set up a dominoes table in its place. It was quite dull playing with them, since they were not familiar with logical strategizing. They had fun though.

            Dominoes were an up-to-four player game. Francis declared it was stupid when he saw there was no room for him. He played video games nearby instead.

            Kyle joined me for a round after the children had their fill. He was not able to best me either, and was as amateurish as the children.

            Francis and Frederick did not have the close bond that the older twins exhibited. Francis entertained himself by creating messes and then complaining to his neat brother about them.

            This resulted in Frederick crying to myself or Kyle on more than one occasion.

            Kyle created a hypothesis. “Francis just needs to burn some energy. You’ll see.”

            They tossed water balloons at one another, and Kyle’s years on the force showed in his powerful arm. He did not take it easy on the boy.

            While Kyle distracted Francis, I complimented Frederick on his cleaning abilities. “Of course it isn’t strange for a boy your age to enjoy scrubbing toilets. It is a vital necessity in society.”

            Unfortunately, our efforts did not solve the problem.

            “Hey Milly, want to see something funny?”

“Please, don’t call me Milly.”

“Whatever Milly, just watch this!”