Dates and Birthdays

            I charged the house to my oldest twins early one Saturday morning. They were too engrossed in their homework to ask where I was going, to which I was thankful.

            Dedrick had called and asked me on a date. This was the first time he phoned since meeting Lois and Milton. I decided to change my usual refusal to an acceptance. For whatever reason, when I saw him at the spring festival, I felt guilt. I had to remind myself that Kyle was dead.

            I tried hard to ignore the fact that he was plagued by fleas. “How many kids does this guy have now?” Mother asked.

“Quite a few,” the witch answered. “Including the ones from his last marriage, I think he’s up to six.”

“That newest wife was hot. What’s he doing barking up my daughter’s old tree?”

“How is he not an elder yet?”

Too annoyed to think properly, I muttered, “Would you two be quiet? The one time you get along…”

“What?” Dedrick asked.

“Oh nothing, simply thinking aloud. Could you please repeat what you were saying?”

“I was asking if you’d like to replace our old wager on the love tester.”

            As I slipped two coins into the slot, I found myself confused by his youth as well.

            Dedrick celebrated our high score, while I mused some more.

            I paid my debt, still not understanding its origin any better than before. “I told you that we would end together,” Dedrick triumphantly announced.

            “If we really are going to become romantically involved again, then I will need you to end any other relationships you have. I do not wish to catch anything worse than fleas.”

            “Of course,” Dedrick beamed. “Anything for you, my prize.”

            We ended the date as an official couple. Although I agreed to be his girlfriend, I had no desires for our relationship to develop anywhere past that level. I was nearly the mother to adults; I did not wish to have a live-in boyfriend or a wedding or anything silly like that. Dedrick would simply make my post-lifetime wish life more bearable.

            I was not the only one in the family going on a date that day. Francis was asked out by one of his classmates. His date was not quite as successful, as he ignored her the entire time. He told me that only a truly remarkable female would be deserving of his attention, and that he doubted that such a thing existed.

            I called a long list of potential guests the next day. It was my oldest twins’ birthdays and I wished to throw them a party. It felt momentous for my children to become young adults. I am not sure why though; they were already so mature. It was not as if much would change.

            The guests started to arrive just as Francis and Frederick were devising a competition to see who could jump the furthest off a swing.

            Kylie surprised me when I saw that she had become a teenager.

            The girl Frederick danced with at prom also agreed to come. I recognized her as the girls’ babysitter, and as the young lady who snuck love notes into our mailbox. I believe she was simply trying to display signs of a gracious guest, but I found an entire stuffed turkey to be too much.

            Aubrey saw the birthday cakes and thought they were hers.

            I sent Francis to crush her excitement with the explanation of their belonging to Milton and Lois.

            She reacted well to the bad news and cheered for Milton with her favorite brother.

            Dedrick celebrated by my side.

            Milton’s caring personality won him an abundant amount of spectators.

            He aged into a man who loved the water, though he had not grown up around it. He also appeared to have a fondness for facial hair.

            I thought he may have shared more similarities between the half siblings that I gave him, versus the one Odessa delivered.

            Lois had her turn next.

            She was quite content with her adult body.

            I chose not to comment on the inappropriate length of her dress.

            The party continued in a busy fashion. I escaped the chaos, fleeing upstairs to work on some research. Because of this, I missed the moment that Milton and Dedrick shared. The moment that perhaps clicked the pieces of my secret together in his head.